Tuesday's Serial: “Lavengro” by George Borrow (in English) - XXV

 

Chapter 49

singular personage—a large sum—papa of rome—armenians—roots of ararat—regular features

 

The Armenian! I frequently saw this individual, availing myself of the permission which he had given me to call upon him. A truly singular personage was he, with his love of amassing money, and his nationality so strong as to be akin to poetry. Many an Armenian I have subsequently known fond of money-getting, and not destitute of national spirit; but never another, who, in the midst of his schemes of lucre, was at all times willing to enter into a conversation on the structure of the Haik language, or who ever offered me money to render into English the fables of Z—— in the hope of astonishing the stock-jobbers of the Exchange with the wisdom of the Haik Esop.

But he was fond of money, very fond. Within a little time I had won his confidence to such a degree that he informed me that the grand wish of his heart was to be possessed of two hundred thousand pounds.

'I think you might satisfy yourself with the half,' said I. 'One hundred thousand pounds is a large sum.'

'You are mistaken,' said the Armenian, 'a hundred thousand pounds is nothing. My father left me that or more at his death. No, I shall never be satisfied with less than two.'

'And what will you do with your riches,' said I, 'when you have obtained them? Will you sit down and muse upon them, or will you deposit them in a cellar, and go down once a day to stare at them? I have heard say that the fulfilment of one's wishes is invariably the precursor of extreme misery, and forsooth I can scarcely conceive a more horrible state of existence than to be without a hope or wish.'

'It is bad enough, I daresay,' said the Armenian; 'it will, however, be time enough to think of disposing of the money when I have procured it. I still fall short by a vast sum of the two hundred thousand pounds.'

I had occasionally much conversation with him on the state and prospects of his nation, especially of that part of it which still continued in the original country of the Haiks—Ararat and its confines, which, it appeared, he had frequently visited. He informed me that since the death of the last Haik monarch, which occurred in the eleventh century, Armenia had been governed both temporally and spiritually by certain personages called patriarchs; their temporal authority, however, was much circumscribed by the Persian and Turk, especially the former, of whom the Armenian spoke with much hatred, whilst their spiritual authority had at various times been considerably undermined by the emissaries of the Papa of Rome, as the Armenian called him.

'The Papa of Rome sent his emissaries at an early period amongst us,' said the Armenian, 'seducing the minds of weak-headed people, persuading them that the hillocks of Rome are higher than the ridges of Ararat; that the Roman Papa has more to say in heaven than the Armenian patriarch, and that puny Latin is a better language than nervous and sonorous Haik.'

'They are both dialects,' said I, 'of the language of Mr. Petulengro, one of whose race I believe to have been the original founder of Rome; but, with respect to religion, what are the chief points of your faith? you are Christians, I believe.'

'Yes,' said the Armenian, 'we are Christians in our way; we believe in God, the Holy Spirit, and Saviour, though we are not prepared to admit that the last personage is not only himself, but the other two. We believe . . . ' and then the Armenian told me of several things which the Haiks believed or disbelieved. 'But what we find most hard of all to believe,' said he, 'is that the man of the mole-hills is entitled to our allegiance, he not being a Haik, or understanding the Haik language.'

'But, by your own confession,' said I, 'he has introduced a schism in your nation, and has amongst you many that believe in him.'

'It is true,' said the Armenian, 'that even on the confines of Ararat there are a great number who consider that mountain to be lower than the hillocks of Rome; but the greater number of degenerate Armenians are to be found amongst those who have wandered to the west; most of the Haik churches of the west consider Rome to be higher than Ararat—most of the Armenians of this place hold that dogma; I, however, have always stood firm in the contrary opinion.'

'Ha! ha!'—here the Armenian laughed in his peculiar manner—'talking of this matter puts me in mind of an adventure which lately befell me, with one of the emissaries of the Papa of Rome, for the Papa of Rome has at present many emissaries in this country, in order to seduce the people from their own quiet religion to the savage heresy of Rome; this fellow came to me partly in the hope of converting me, but principally to extort money for the purpose of furthering the designs of Rome in this country. I humoured the fellow at first, keeping him in play for nearly a month, deceiving and laughing at him. At last he discovered that he could make nothing of me, and departed with the scowl of Caiaphas, whilst I cried after him, 'The roots of Ararat are deeper than those of Rome.'

The Armenian had occasionally reverted to the subject of the translation of the Haik Esop, which he had still a lurking desire that I should execute; but I had invariably declined the undertaking, without, however, stating my reasons. On one occasion, when we had been conversing on the subject, the Armenian, who had been observing my countenance for some time with much attention, remarked, 'Perhaps, after all, you are right, and you might employ your time to better advantage. Literature is a fine thing, especially Haik literature, but neither that nor any other would be likely to serve as a foundation to a man's fortune: and to make a fortune should be the principal aim of every one's life; therefore listen to me. Accept a seat at the desk opposite to my Moldavian clerk, and receive the rudiments of a merchant's education. You shall be instructed in the Armenian way of doing business—I think you would make an excellent merchant.'

'Why do you think so?'

'Because you have something of the Armenian look.'

'I understand you,' said I; 'you mean to say that I squint!'

'Not exactly,' said the Armenian, 'but there is certainly a kind of irregularity in your features. One eye appears to me larger than the other—never mind, but rather rejoice; in that irregularity consists your strength. All people with regular features are fools; it is very hard for them, you'll say, but there is no help: all we can do, who are not in such a predicament, is to pity those who are. Well! will you accept my offer? No! you are a singular individual; but I must not forget my own concerns. I must now go forth, having an appointment by which I hope to make money.'

 

 

Chapter 50

wish fulfilled—extraordinary figure—bueno—noah—the two faces—i don't blame him—of money

 

The fulfilment of the Armenian's grand wish was nearer at hand than either he or I had anticipated. Partly owing to the success of a bold speculation, in which he had some time previously engaged, and partly owing to the bequest of a large sum of money by one of his nation who died at this period in Paris, he found himself in the possession of a fortune somewhat exceeding two hundred thousand pounds; this fact he communicated to me one evening about an hour after the close of 'Change; the hour at which I generally called, and at which I mostly found him at home.

'Well,' said I, 'and what do you intend to do next?'

'I scarcely know,' said the Armenian. 'I was thinking of that when you came in. I don't see anything that I can do, save going on in my former course. After all, I was perhaps too moderate in making the possession of two hundred thousand pounds the summit of my ambition; there are many individuals in this town who possess three times that sum, and are not yet satisfied. No, I think I can do no better than pursue the old career; who knows but I may make the two hundred thousand three or four?—there is already a surplus, which is an encouragement; however, we will consider the matter over a goblet of wine; I have observed of late that you have become partial to my Cyprus.'

And it came to pass that, as we were seated over the Cyprus wine, we heard a knock at the door. 'Adelante!' cried the Armenian; whereupon the door opened, and in walked a somewhat extraordinary figure—a man in a long loose tunic of a stuff striped with black and yellow; breeches of plush velvet, silk stockings, and shoes with silver buckles. On his head he wore a high-peaked hat; he was tall, had a hooked nose, and in age was about fifty.

'Welcome, Rabbi Manasseh,' said the Armenian. 'I know your knock—you are welcome; sit down.'

'I am welcome,' said Manasseh, sitting down; 'he—he—he! you know my knock—I bring you money—bueno!'

There was something very peculiar in the sound of that bueno—I never forgot it.

Thereupon a conversation ensued between Rabbi Manasseh and the Armenian, in a language which I knew to be Spanish, though a peculiar dialect. It related to a mercantile transaction. The Rabbi sighed heavily as he delivered to the other a considerable sum of money.

'It is right,' said the Armenian, handing a receipt. 'It is right; and I am quite satisfied.'

'You are satisfied—you have taken money. Bueno, I have nothing to say against your being satisfied.'

'Come, Rabbi,' said the Armenian, 'do not despond; it may be your turn next to take money; in the meantime, can't you be persuaded to taste my Cyprus?'

'He—he—he! señor, you know I do not love wine. I love Noah when he is himself; but, as Janus, I love him not. But you are merry; bueno, you have a right to be so.'

'Excuse me,' said I, 'but does Noah ever appear as Janus?'

'He—he—he!' said the Rabbi, 'he only appeared as Janus once—una vez quando estuvo borracho; which means—'

'I understand,' said I; 'when he was . . . ' and I drew the side of my right hand sharply across my left wrist.

'Are you one of our people?' said the Rabbi.

'No,' said I, 'I am one of the Goyim; but I am only half enlightened. Why should Noah be Janus when he was in that state?'

'He—he—he! you must know that in Lasan akhades wine is janin.'

'In Armenian, kini,' said I; 'in Welsh, gwin; Latin, vinum; but do you think that Janus and janin are one?'

'Do I think? Don't the commentators say so? Does not Master Leo Abarbenel say so in his Dialogues of Divine Love?'

'But,' said I, 'I always thought that Janus was a god of the ancient Romans, who stood in a temple open in time of war, and shut in time of peace; he was represented with two faces, which—which—'

'He—he—he!' said the Rabbi, rising from his seat; 'he had two faces, had he? And what did those two faces typify? You do not know; no, nor did the Romans who carved him with two faces know why they did so; for they were only half enlightened, like you and the rest of the Goyim. Yet they were right in carving him with two faces looking from each other—they were right, though they knew not why; there was a tradition among them that the Janinoso had two faces, but they knew not that one was for the world which was gone and the other for the world before him—for the drowned world and for the present, as Master Leo Abarbenel says in his Dialogues of Divine Love. He—he—he!' continued the Rabbi, who had by this time advanced to the door, and, turning round, waved the two forefingers of his right hand in our faces; 'the Goyims and Epicouraiyim are clever men, they know how to make money better than we of Israel. My good friend there is a clever man, I bring him money, he never brought me any; bueno, I do not blame him, he knows much, very much; but one thing there is my friend does not know, nor any of the Epicureans, he does not know the sacred thing—he has never received the gift of interpretation which God alone gives to the seed—he has his gift, I have mine—he is satisfied, I don't blame him, bueno.'

And, with this last word in his mouth, he departed.

'Is that man a native of Spain?' I demanded.

'Not a native of Spain,' said the Armenian, 'though he is one of those who call themselves Spanish Jews, and who are to be found scattered throughout Europe, speaking the Spanish language transmitted to them by their ancestors, who were expelled from Spain in the time of Ferdinand and Isabella.'

'The Jews are a singular people,' said I.

'A race of cowards and dastards,' said the Armenian, 'without a home or country; servants to servants; persecuted and despised by all.'

'And what are the Haiks?' I demanded.

'Very different from the Jews,' replied the Armenian; 'the Haiks have a home—a country, and can occasionally use a good sword; though it is true they are not what they might be.'

'Then it is a shame that they do not become so,' said I; 'but they are too fond of money. There is yourself, with two hundred thousand pounds in your pocket, craving for more, whilst you might be turning your wealth to the service of your country.'

'In what manner?' said the Armenian.

'I have heard you say that the grand oppressor of your country is the Persian; why not attempt to free your country from his oppression—you have two hundred thousand pounds, and money is the sinew of war?'

'Would you, then, have me attack the Persian?'

'I scarcely know what to say; fighting is a rough trade, and I am by no means certain that you are calculated for the scratch. It is not every one who has been brought up in the school of Mr. Petulengro and Tawno Chikno. All I can say is, that if I were an Armenian, and had two hundred thousand pounds to back me, I would attack the Persian.'

'Hem!' said the Armenian.

Wednesday's Good Reading: "Pobreza e Grossura" by Olavo de Carvalho (in Portuguese)

 Bravo!, julho de 2000

 Neste país você não pode pedir emprego e muito menos dinheiro emprestado a um conhecido sem que ele instantaneamente assuma ares paternais e comece a lhe dar conselhos, a ralhar com você chamando-o de irresponsável, leviano e miolo-mole. E dê graças a Deus de que ele o faça em tom bonachão e não transforme a humilhação sutil em massacre ostensivo. Finda a cena, ele sai todo satisfeito com a consciência do dever cumprido e considera-se dispensado de lhe arranjar o emprego ou o dinheiro. E você? Bem, você sai duro, desempregado… e culpado.

Esse mesmo sujeito é capaz de, na mesma noite, oferecer um jantar tomando o máximo cuidado para que a arrumação da mesa e a distribuição dos convidados obedeçam estritamente às regras da mais fina etiqueta.

Um indício seguro de barbarismo num povo é a atenção excessiva concedida aos sinais convencionais de boa educação e o desprezo ou ignorância dos princípios básicos da convivência que constituem a essência mesma da boa educação.

O bárbaro, o selvagem, pode decorar as regras e imitá-las na frente de quem ele acha que liga para elas. Mas não capta o espírito delas, não percebe que são apenas uma cartilha de solicitude, de atenção, de bondade, que pode ser abandonada tão logo a gente aprendeu o verdadeiro sentido do que é ser solícito, atencioso e bom.

Meu pai era um sujeito relaxado, que às vezes ia de pijama receber as visitas. Mas ele chamava de “senhor” cada mendigo que o abordava na rua, e sem que ele me dissesse uma palavra aprendi que o homem em dificuldades necessitava de mais demonstrações de respeito do que as pessoas em situação normal. Quanto mais respeitoso, mais cuidadoso, mais escrupuloso cada um não deveria ser então com um amigo que, vencendo a natural resistência de mostrar inferioridade, vem lhe pedir ajuda! Esta regra elementar é sistematicamente ignorada entre as nossas classes médias e altas, principalmente por aquelas pessoas que se imaginam as mais cultas, as mais civilizadas e – valha-me Deus! – as mais amigas dos pobres.

Fico horrorizado quando vejo alguém enxotar um flanelinha como se fosse um cachorro, e nunca vi alguém fazê-lo com a desenvoltura, o aplomb, a consciência tranqüila de um intelectual de esquerda! Nos anos 60, corria o dito de que ajudar os pobres individualmente era “alienação burguesa”, ópio sentimental, sucedâneo da revolução salvadora. Passaram-se quarenta anos, a revolução salvadora não veio (onde veio, os pobres ficaram mais pobres ainda) e duas gerações de necessitados apertaram ainda mais os cintos em homenagem à prioridade da revolução. Mas não conheço um só militante comunista do meu tempo e do meu meio que não esteja com a vida ganha, que não ostente como um sinal de maturidade triunfante a segurança financeira adquirida graças ao apadrinhamento da máfia política que, até hoje, domina o mercado de empregos na imprensa, na publicidade, no ensino superior e no mundo editorial.

Hoje não precisam mais do pretexto revolucionário para enxotar flanelinhas. Seu discurso tornou-se palavra oficial, as prefeituras e governos estaduais nos advertem, em cartazes piedosos, para não dar esmolas. Sim, a caridade individual está em baixa. Os frutos da bondade humana não devem ir direto para o bolso do necessitado: devem ir para as ONGs e os órgãos públicos, sustentando funcionários e diretores, financiando movimentos políticos, pagando despesas de aluguel, administração, publicidade e transporte, para no fim, bem no fim, se sobrar alguma coisa, virar sopa dos pobres, diante das câmeras, para a glória de São Betinho.

Há quem neste país tenha nojo da corrupção oficial. Pois eu tenho é da caridade oficial.

Ainda há quem diga: “Mas se você dá dinheiro o sujeito vai beber na primeira esquina!” Pois que beba! Tão logo ele o embolsou, o dinheiro é dele. Vocês querem educar o pobre “para a cidadania” e começam por lhe negar o direito de gastar o próprio dinheiro como bem entenda? Querem educá-lo sem primeiro respeitá-lo como um cidadão livre que atormentado pela miséria tem o direito de encher a cara tanto quanto o faria, mutatis mutandis, um banqueiro falido? Querem educá-lo impingindo-lhe a mentira humilhante de que sua pobreza é uma espécie de menoridade, de inferioridade biológica que o incapacita para administrar os três ou quatro reais que lhe deram de esmola? Não! Se querem educá-lo, comecem pelo mais óbvio: sejam educados. Digam “senhor”, “senhora”, perguntem onde mora, se o dinheiro que lhes deram basta para chegar lá, se precisa de um sanduíche, de um remédio, de uma amizade. Façam isso todos os dias e em três meses verão esse homem, essa mulher, erguer-se da condição miserável, endireitar a espinha, lutar por um emprego, vencer.

Na verdade, a barreira que impede o acesso de pobres e mendicantes brasileiros a uma vida melhor é menos econômica que social. Façam um teste. Quanto custa um frango? Assado, com farofa. Cinco reais no máximo, em geral menos. Quer dizer que um mendigo, pedindo esmola em qualquer das grandes capitais do Brasil, pode comer pelo menos um frango por dia, se não dois, e ainda lhe sobra o dinheiro da condução. Para você fazer uma idéia de quanto um país onde isso é possível é um país rico e generoso, tente esta comparação. Quando Franklin D. Roosevelt lançou o New Deal, um dos objetivos principais do ambicioso plano econômico foi assim anunciado pelo rádio: “Assegurar que cada família deste país tenha em sua mesa um frango por semana.” Ouviram bem? Um frango por semana para quatro ou cinco pessoas. Na época pareceu um ideal quase utópico. Pois bem: estamos numa terra onde velhas desamparadas que se arrastam pelas ruas comem um frango por dia, onde os meninos de rua pedem esmola em frente ao McDonald’s para completar o preço de um BigMac com fritas de três em três horas, onde os bebês famintos exibidos pelas mães em prantos usam fraldas descartáveis, onde as casas dos bairros miseráveis têm antenas parabólicas e os catadores de lixo se comunicam com seus sócios por telefones celulares.

Em contrapartida, façam outro teste: peguem um sujeito sujo e esfarrapado, encham-no de dinheiro e façam-no entrar numa loja de roupas – não digo uma loja elegante, mas qualquer uma — para comprar um terno. Será enxotado. E, se gritar: “Eu tenho dinheiro!”, vai terminar na polícia, com holofote na cara, tendo de se explicar muito bem explicadinho, isto se não for obrigado a escorregar “algum” para a mão do sargento.

O mesmo pobre que pode comer um frango por dia tem de comê-lo na calçada, com os cães, porque não tem acesso aos lugares reservados aos seres humanos. Está certo que você, gerente do restaurante, fique constrangido de botar um sujeito estropiado e fedido no meio dos seus clientes distintos. Mas não vê que mandá-lo comer na rua é mais falta de educação ainda? Pelo menos dê-lhe de comer num cantinho discreto, converse com ele sobre as dificuldades da vida, ofereça-lhe uma camisa, uma calça. Seja educado, caramba! Pois se você, que está bem empregado e bem vestido, tem o direito de ser grosso, que primores de polidez pode esperar do pobre? Se um dia, cansado de levar chutes, ele o manda tomar naquele lugar, não se pode dizer que esteja privado do senso das proporções. E não me venha com aquela história de “Se eu tratar bem um só mendigo, no dia seguinte haverá uma fila deles na minha porta”. Isso pode ser verdade em casos isolados, mas não no cômputo final: se todos os restaurantes tratarem bem os mendigos, logo haverá mais restaurantes que mendigos. Conte os mendigos e os restaurantes da Avenida Atlântica e diga se não tenho razão. Isto sem que entrem no cálculo os bares e padarias.

O brasileiro de classe média e alta está virando uma gente estúpida que clama contra a miséria no meio da abundância porque cada um não quer usar seus recursos para aliviar a desgraça de quem está ao seu alcance, e todos ficam esperando a solução mágica que, num relance, mudará o quadro geral. Sofrem de platonismo à outrance: crêem na existência de um geral em si, dotado de substância metafísica própria, independente dos casos particulares que o compõem.

Por isso é que quando a propaganda do Collor inventou aquela coisa de “Não votem em Lula porque ele vai obrigar cada família de classe alta a adotar um menino de rua”, eu me disse a mim mesmo: “Raios, se isso fosse verdade eu ficaria satisfeito de votar no Lula.” Só acredito é em gente ajudar gente, uma por uma, não na mágica platônica das “mudanças estruturais”, pretexto de revoluções e matanças que resultam sempre em mais pobreza ainda.

Na verdade, quem acredita nelas erra até ao dar nome ao problema geral. Quando, revoltados ante a desgraça do povo brasileiro, gritamos: “Fome!”, algo está falhando na nossa percepção da realidade social. No mais das vezes, o que falta não é comida, não é dinheiro: é as pessoas compreenderem que a pobreza não é um estigma, não é uma desonra, é uma coisa que pode acontecer a qualquer um e da qual ninguém se liberta só com dinheiro, sem o reforço psicológico de um ambiente que o ajude a sentir-se novamente normal e, em suma, um membro da espécie humana.

Entre as causas culturais da pobreza, a principal não está nos pobres: está na falta de educação dos outros.

 

Tuesday's Serial: “Lavengro” by George Borrow (in English) - XXIV

 

Chapter 47

new acquaintance—wired cases—bread and wine—armenian colonies—learning without money—what a language—the tide—your foible—learning of the haiks—pressing invitation

 

Just as I was about to reply to the interrogation of my new-formed acquaintance, a man with a dusky countenance, probably one of the Lascars, or Mulattos, of whom the old woman had spoken, came up and whispered to him, and with this man he presently departed, not however before he had told me the place of his abode, and requested me to visit him.

After the lapse of a few days, I called at the house which he had indicated. It was situated in a dark and narrow street, in the heart of the City, at no great distance from the Bank. I entered a counting-room, in which a solitary clerk, with a foreign look, was writing. The stranger was not at home; returning the next day, however, I met him at the door as he was about to enter; he shook me warmly by the hand. 'I am glad to see you,' said he, 'follow me, I was just thinking of you.' He led me through the counting-room, to an apartment up a flight of stairs; before ascending, however, he looked into the book in which the foreign-visaged clerk was writing, and, seemingly not satisfied with the manner in which he was executing his task, he gave him two or three cuffs, telling him at the same time that he deserved crucifixion.

The apartment above stairs, to which he led me, was large, with three windows, which opened upon the street. The walls were hung with wired cases, apparently containing books. There was a table and two or three chairs; but the principal article of furniture was a long sofa, extending from the door by which we entered to the farther end of the apartment. Seating himself upon the sofa, my new acquaintance motioned to me to sit beside him, and then, looking me full in the face, repeated his former inquiry. 'In the name of all that is wonderful, how came you to know aught of my language?'

'There is nothing wonderful in that,' said I; 'we are at the commencement of a philological age, every one studies languages; that is, every one who is fit for nothing else; philology being the last resource of dulness and ennui, I have got a little in advance of the throng, by mastering the Armenian alphabet; but I foresee the time when every unmarriageable miss, and desperate blockhead, will likewise have acquired the letter of Mesroub, and will know the term for bread, in Armenian, and perhaps that for wine.'

'Kini,' said my companion; and that and the other word put me in mind of the duties of hospitality. 'Will you eat bread and drink wine with me?'

'Willingly,' said I. Whereupon my companion, unlocking a closet, produced on a silver salver, a loaf of bread, with a silver-handled knife, and wine in a silver flask, with cups of the same metal. 'I hope you like my fare,' said he, after we had both eaten and drunk.

'I like your bread,' said I, 'for it is stale; I like not your wine, it is sweet, and I hate sweet wine.'

'It is wine of Cyprus,' said my entertainer; and, when I found that it was wine of Cyprus, I tasted it again, and the second taste pleased me much better than the first, notwithstanding that I still thought it somewhat sweet. 'So,' said I after a pause, looking at my companion, 'you are an Armenian.'

'Yes,' said he, 'an Armenian born in London, but not less an Armenian on that account. My father was a native of Ispahan, one of the celebrated Armenian colony which was established there shortly after the time of the dreadful hunger, which drove the children of Haik in swarms from their original country, and scattered them over most parts of the eastern and western world. In Ispahan he passed the greater portion of his life, following mercantile pursuits with considerable success. Certain enemies, however, having accused him to the despot of the place, of using seditious language, he was compelled to flee, leaving most of his property behind. Travelling in the direction of the west, he came at last to London, where he established himself, and where he eventually died, leaving behind a large property and myself, his only child, the fruit of a marriage with an Armenian Englishwoman, who did not survive my birth more than three months.'

The Armenian then proceeded to tell me that he had carried on the business of his father, which seemed to embrace most matters, from buying silks of Lascars, to speculating in the funds, and that he had considerably increased the property which his father had left him. He candidly confessed that he was wonderfully fond of gold, and said there was nothing like it for giving a person respectability and consideration in the world: to which assertion I made no answer, being not exactly prepared to contradict it.

And, when he had related to me his history, he expressed a desire to know something more of myself, whereupon I gave him the outline of my history, concluding with saying, 'I am now a poor author, or rather philologist, upon the streets of London, possessed of many tongues, which I find of no use in the world.'

'Learning without money is anything but desirable,' said the Armenian, 'as it unfits a man for humble occupations. It is true that it may occasionally beget him friends; I confess to you that your understanding something of my language weighs more with me than the service you rendered me in rescuing my pocket-book the other day from the claws of that scoundrel whom I yet hope to see hanged, if not crucified, notwithstanding there were in that pocket-book papers and documents of considerable value. Yes, that circumstance makes my heart warm towards you, for I am proud of my language—as I indeed well may be—what a language, noble and energetic! quite original, differing from all others both in words and structure.'

'You are mistaken,' said I; 'many languages resemble the Armenian both in structure and words.'

'For example?' said the Armenian.

'For example,' said I, 'the English.'

'The English!' said the Armenian; 'show me one word in which the English resembles the Armenian.'

'You walk on London Bridge,' said I.

'Yes,' said the Armenian.

'I saw you look over the balustrade the other morning.'

'True,' said the Armenian.

'Well, what did you see rushing up through the arches with noise and foam?'

'What was it?' said the Armenian. 'What was it?—you don't mean the tide?'

'Do I not?' said I.

'Well, what has the tide to do with the matter?'

'Much,' said I; 'what is the tide?'

'The ebb and flow of the sea,' said the Armenian.

'The sea itself; what is the Haik word for sea?'

The Armenian gave a strong gasp; then, nodding his head thrice, 'You are right,' said he, 'the English word tide is the Armenian for sea; and now I begin to perceive that there are many English words which are Armenian; there is —— and ——; and there again in French, there is —— and —— derived from the Armenian. How strange, how singular—I thank you. It is a proud thing to see that the language of my race has had so much influence over the languages of the world.'

I saw that all that related to his race was the weak point of the Armenian. I did not flatter the Armenian with respect to his race or language. 'An inconsiderable people,' said I, 'shrewd and industrious, but still an inconsiderable people. A language bold and expressive, and of some antiquity, derived, though perhaps not immediately, from some much older tongue. I do not think that the Armenian has had any influence over the formation of the languages of the world. I am not much indebted to the Armenian for the solution of any doubts; whereas to the language of Mr. Petulengro—'

'I have heard you mention that name before,' said the Armenian; 'who is Mr. Petulengro?'

And then I told the Armenian who Mr. Petulengro was. The Armenian spoke contemptuously of Mr. Petulengro and his race. 'Don't speak contemptuously of Mr. Petulengro,' said I, 'nor of anything belonging to him. He is a dark mysterious personage; all connected with him is a mystery, especially his language; but I believe that his language is doomed to solve a great philological problem—Mr. Petulengro—'

'You appear agitated,' said the Armenian; 'take another glass of wine; you possess a great deal of philological knowledge, but it appears to me that the language of this Petulengro is your foible: but let us change the subject; I feel much interested in you, and would fain be of service to you. Can you cast accounts?'

I shook my head.

'Keep books?'

'I have an idea that I could write books,' said I; 'but, as to keeping them—' and here again I shook my head.

The Armenian was silent some time; all at once, glancing at one of the wire cases, with which, as I have already said, the walls of the room were hung, he asked me if I was well acquainted with the learning of the Haiks. 'The books in these cases,' said he, 'contain the masterpieces of Haik learning.'

'No,' said I; 'all I know of the learning of the Haiks is their translation of the Bible.'

'You have never read Z——?'

'No,' said I, 'I have never read Z——.'

'I have a plan,' said the Armenian; 'I think I can employ you agreeably and profitably; I should like to see Z—— in an English dress; you shall translate Z——. If you can read the Scriptures in Armenian, you can translate Z——. He is our Esop, the most acute and clever of all our moral writers—his philosophy—'

'I will have nothing to do with him,' said I.

'Wherefore?' said the Armenian.

'There is an old proverb,' said I, '“that a burnt child avoids the fire.” I have burnt my hands sufficiently with attempting to translate philosophy, to make me cautious of venturing upon it again'; and then I told the Armenian how I had been persuaded by the publisher to translate his philosophy into German, and what sorry thanks I had received; 'And who knows,' said I, 'but the attempt to translate Armenian philosophy into English might be attended with yet more disagreeable consequences?'

The Armenian smiled. 'You will find me very different from the publisher.'

'In many points I have no doubt I should,' I replied; 'but at the present moment I feel like a bird which has escaped from a cage, and, though hungry, feels no disposition to return. Of what nation is the dark man below stairs, whom I saw writing at the desk?'

'He is a Moldave,' said the Armenian; 'the dog (and here his eyes sparkled) deserves to be crucified, he is continually making mistakes.'

The Armenian again renewed his proposition about Z——, which I again refused, as I felt but little inclination to place myself beneath the jurisdiction of a person who was in the habit of cuffing those whom he employed, when they made mistakes. I presently took my departure; not, however, before I had received from the Armenian a pressing invitation to call upon him whenever I should feel disposed.

 

 

Chapter 48

what to do—strong enough—fame and profit—alliterative euphony—a plan—bagnigge wells

 

Anxious thoughts frequently disturbed me at this time with respect to what I was to do, and how support myself in the Great City. My future prospects were gloomy enough, and I looked forward and feared; sometimes I felt half disposed to accept the offer of the Armenian, and to commence forthwith, under his superintendence, the translation of the Haik Esop; but the remembrance of the cuffs which I had seen him bestow upon the Moldavian, when glancing over his shoulder into the ledger or whatever it was on which he was employed, immediately drove the inclination from my mind. I could not support the idea of the possibility of his staring over my shoulder upon my translation of the Haik Esop, and, dissatisfied with my attempts, treating me as he had treated the Moldavian clerk; placing myself in a position which exposed me to such treatment would indeed be plunging into the fire after escaping from the frying-pan. The publisher, insolent and overbearing as he was, whatever he might have wished or thought, had never lifted his hand against me, or told me that I merited crucifixion.

What was I to do? turn porter? I was strong; but there was something besides strength required to ply the trade of a porter—a mind of a particularly phlegmatic temperament, which I did not possess. What should I do? enlist as a soldier? I was tall enough; but something besides height is required to make a man play with credit the part of soldier, I mean a private one—a spirit, if spirit it can be called, which will not only enable a man to submit with patience to insolence and abuse, and even to cuffs and kicks, but occasionally to the lash. I felt that I was not qualified to be a soldier, at least a private one; far better be a drudge to the most ferocious of publishers, editing Newgate lives, and writing in eighteenpenny reviews—better to translate the Haik Esop, under the superintendence of ten Armenians, than be a private soldier in the English service; I did not decide rashly—I knew something of soldiering. What should I do? I thought that I would make a last and desperate attempt to dispose of the ballads and of Ab Gwilym.

I had still an idea that, provided I could persuade any spirited publisher to give these translations to the world, I should acquire both considerable fame and profit; not, perhaps, a world-embracing fame such as Byron's; but a fame not to be sneered at, which would last me a considerable time, and would keep my heart from breaking;—profit, not equal to that which Scott had made by his wondrous novels, but which would prevent me from starving, and enable me to achieve some other literary enterprise. I read and reread my ballads, and the more I read them the more I was convinced that the public, in the event of their being published, would freely purchase, and hail them with the merited applause. Were not the deeds and adventures wonderful and heart-stirring—from which it is true I could claim no merit, being but the translator; but had I not rendered them into English, with all their original fire? Yes, I was confident I had; and I had no doubt that the public would say so. And then, with respect to Ab Gwilym, had I not done as much justice to him as to the Danish ballads; not only rendering faithfully his thoughts, imagery, and phraseology, but even preserving in my translation the alliterative euphony which constitutes one of the most remarkable features of Welsh prosody? Yes, I had accomplished all this; and I doubted not that the public would receive my translations from Ab Gwilym with quite as much eagerness as my version of the Danish ballads. But I found the publishers as intractable as ever, and to this day the public has never had an opportunity of doing justice to the glowing fire of my ballad versification, and the alliterative euphony of my imitations of Ab Gwilym.

I had not seen Francis Ardry since the day I had seen him taking lessons in elocution. One afternoon as I was seated at my table, my head resting on my hands, he entered my apartment; sitting down, he inquired of me why I had not been to see him.

'I might ask the same question of you,' I replied. 'Wherefore have you not been to see me?' Whereupon Francis Ardry told me that he had been much engaged in his oratorical exercises, also in escorting the young Frenchwoman about to places of public amusement; he then again questioned me as to the reason of my not having been to see him.

I returned an evasive answer. The truth was, that for some time past my appearance, owing to the state of my finances, had been rather shabby, and I did not wish to expose a fashionable young man like Francis Ardry, who lived in a fashionable neighbourhood, to the imputation of having a shabby acquaintance. I was aware that Francis Ardry was an excellent fellow; but, on that very account, I felt, under existing circumstances, a delicacy in visiting him.

It is very possible that he had an inkling of how matters stood, as he presently began to talk of my affairs and prospects. I told him of my late ill success with the booksellers, and inveighed against their blindness to their own interest in refusing to publish my translations. 'The last that I addressed myself to,' said I, 'told me not to trouble him again unless I could bring him a decent novel or a tale.'

'Well,' said Frank, 'and why did you not carry him a decent novel or a tale?'

'Because I have neither,' said I; 'and to write them is, I believe above my capacity. At present I feel divested of all energy—heartless, and almost hopeless.'

'I see how it is,' said Francis Ardry, 'you have overworked yourself, and, worst of all, to no purpose. Take my advice; cast all care aside, and only think of diverting yourself for a month at least.'

'Divert myself!' said I; 'and where am I to find the means?'

'Be that care on my shoulders,' said Francis Ardry. 'Listen to me—my uncles have been so delighted with the favourable accounts which they have lately received from T—— of my progress in oratory, that, in the warmth of their hearts, they made me a present yesterday of two hundred pounds. This is more money than I want, at least for the present; do me the favour to take half of it as a loan—hear me,' said he, observing that I was about to interrupt him; 'I have a plan in my head—one of the prettiest in the world. The sister of my charmer is just arrived from France; she cannot speak a word of English; and, as Annette and myself are much engaged in our own matters, we cannot pay her the attention which we should wish, and which she deserves, for she is a truly fascinating creature, although somewhat differing from my charmer, having blue eyes and flaxen hair; whilst, Annette, on the contrary— But I hope you will shortly see Annette. Now, my plan is this—Take the money, dress yourself fashionably, and conduct Annette's sister to Bagnigge Wells.'

'And what should we do at Bagnigge Wells?'

'Do!' said Francis Ardry. 'Dance!'

'But,' said I, 'I scarcely know anything of dancing.'

'Then here's an excellent opportunity of improving yourself. Like most Frenchwomen, she dances divinely; however, if you object to Bagnigge Wells and dancing, go to Brighton, and remain there a month or two, at the end of which time you can return with your mind refreshed and invigorated, and materials, perhaps, for a tale or novel.'

'I never heard a more foolish plan,' said I, 'or one less likely to terminate profitably or satisfactorily. I thank you, however, for your offer, which is, I daresay, well meant. If I am to escape from my cares and troubles, and find my mind refreshed and invigorated, I must adopt other means than conducting a French demoiselle to Brighton or Bagnigge Wells, defraying the expense by borrowing from a friend.'

Monday's Illustrated Word: "Night School" by unknown writer (in English)

 art by George Appel & Lou Ferstadt - Snappy Comics #1 - Cima Publication Company, 1945.